also i'm rlly scared of posting my sona online now. what if someone says "UOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 😭😭💢💢💢". i'd cry i'm not joking

i will eat the crabs

lord what did i do to deserve this. oh my god i'm so sorry for all the times i've cursed JUST PLEASE MAKE MY PHYSICAL HEALTH BETTER. WHAT DID I DO

WHAT FOOD DID I EAT. WHAT TRASH DID I TREAD ON. WHAT MICRO OGRANISM SNUCK INTO MY INSIDES. WHAT CYST HAS DEVELOPED. WHICH ORGAN HAS A TORSION THS TIME. I KNOW that periods can't give these bad of cramps and body ache and make me wanna faint gng WHAT IS IT. man i will box it if it shows up I'M NOT KIDDING. oh my god can i stop being ill for ONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MOMENT. no one's taking me seriously anymore because of how often it happens AND NEITHER AM I. also why does my back hurts so BADDDD i can't even sleep, i just wake up with back aches that stay for the day until i'm about to sleep... and then THEY RISE UP AGAIn

God. Holy God. I'm sorry just PLEASE HELP ME i do not give a DOOK about my mental health. I CAN LIVE WITH THE WORST MENTAL HEALTH EVER IF I'M PHYSICALLY OKAY, BUT A DUO OF BAD METAL AND PHYSICAL IS LITERALLY MAKING ME TURN INTO THAT ASH BABY. PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE I AM SORRY. I EVEN CENSOR MYSELF AND SAY DOOK INSTEAD OF THAT WORD. IS THAT STILL BAD. SHOULD I SAY "DOODLE" INSTEAD. i'm crying oh my god how do i live liek this....... joking i'm ok reader. actually no i'm on a downwards spiral but at least i have paimon and the natlan 5.1 quest. going weak 💪💪💪💪💪💪🔥🔥🔥 I'M IN MY PRIME please let this be the final form i just want to be a silly little girl. i am no t built for THIS

hi do be okay and don't worry i'm just being bratty, moon'll be fine!!

if you loved me, you would've messaged me

tired

can everyone stop ignoring me for one god damned second

thanks

oh god i've been stuck at home for 5 days with this flu that keeps on getting worse and worse oh god

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY MOTHER!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR MOTHERRRRR HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

wish her a happy birthday NOW

so... guess who's parents are gonna get a divorce!! this will definitely not stunt my mental growth or hinder my performance in any way shape or thing reader!

um... this started like ereyesterday. long story short, my father starved me and my mom, and my mom, who had a raging migraine due to being starved for hours, ended up snapping at him. Usually, if we don't deliver food within an hour, he'll throw a tantrum and threaten to hurt mom. Sometimes verbally abuse me if I try to stop him from hurting mom. He knows he'll get in big trouble if he lays a hand on me. And, because mom snapped at him (rightfully so) he... didn't even apologise and started spouting curse words and straight up curses at my mom. yippie!! at this point I'm sick of these weekly fights so I just stood up and got a heavy bottle because they took it into my room (mom was talking to me, the man came in and started cursing again). After all that mess which I didn't want to be involved in, the next day went ok... I was scared to death (genuinely, couldn't stop sobbing and scramble-writing in my sketchbook in class), but because of my true unspoken rizz, when we were at home, I managed to somehow immediately make him think of me as a daughter by doing an eyebrow raise and a fist bump as i walked by to get a water bottle??? reader you should definitely have me as a spy i have RAW UNSPOKEN IMMACULATE rizz!!!! anyways he sat me down and talked dook about my mother to me and forced me to video call my (paternal side) uncle...

so!!!! he left for a wedding today... won't be back for a day or two. just heard mom rant about him to my uncle, anddd... tada he's gonna be taken care of!! and I mean by divorce or something he's not gonna die I swear giggol giggol... I was sitting right next to her and it's worse than I imagined? he probably tried to cheat when I was like 5 who in the hell would like something like him...,, and he's literally a deadbeat dad at this point. Complains about low income but doesn't rent out that whole room he got for free with his office and instead has it to just be covered in dust and used by paternal side?? like you do realise how much money you could make off that right. AND OH MY GOD THE TINIEST CRITICISM WHICH COMES FROM A PLACE OF GENUINE HELP, AND HE LOSES IT??? "but he's still your dad" ok and I'M STILL HIS DAUGHTER. MY MOTHER IS STILL HIS WIFE, AND THE BIRTHGIVER OF HIS DAUGHTER, AND THE BASICALLY BREADWINNER OF THE FAMILY.

but i actually feel depressed. at least that's what moon thinks? she's disassociating a lot. she doesn't know how to feel. if she didn't disassociate, definitely a lot of despair, horror, and don't know what to do... moon wants to build her future, how much will this affect it? will she have enough money to keep on living? divorce is such a taboo, and it's even more so in asia, and especially in a conservative asian country like mine (even though most asian countries are majorly conservative...) but i'm tired. mom is tired. my maternal family is tired. i don't want to be related to it. i don't want its blood in mine. i don't want its genes. but i'll have to unfortunately live like this, forever.

you can make fatherless jokes it's okay but pls don't be annoying reader... love you and take care! this is so traumatising oh ogd

ERM. FIRST OFF ALL... just going to quickly describe what happened yesterday...

So FIRST OF ALL i went to school... i'm on my period and stuff and i'm too embarrassed to get into detail but let's just say the cloth went thrice red yesterday for the first time and the cramps clawed at my skin. ASIDE FROM THAT, it started raining at like the second last lesson!! it rained ereyesterday too but this one... this one flooded like the outside of the school lmao and NOT ONLY THE GROUNDS, THE ROADS OUTSIDE OUTSIDE TOO. LITERALLY WATER EVERYWHERE. There was SUCH loud thunder again and again and it was. a mess. Like GOD but it was kind of fun tho.. so we stood in the corridor for ~30 minutes before finally being allowed to go downstairs to the parking lots........... which were drenched. So we stood at the basketball court, which had way too many puddles for comfort... I still remember all the paper boats the juniors kept making LMAO i hate kids but that was funny... So my dad came at last, and... So, the flooding was about... ankle high for basically everyone (people are commonly ~5'4" here). For me it was an inch or two higher than my ankles, and even though my thallassophobia was gnawing at my neck, I was NOT going to stay at a public place (esp with cis men) while on my period for longer than 1 second. Turns out periods are a great motivator!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im crying it was horrid AUUUUUUUUGHGHGHHG but so that's that... OH. THE FUN PART THO!!!

So one of the girls I've known for ~8 years was leaving yesterday. It was kind of emotional, we knew it for like a week or two but she just told the staff yesterday LMAO and... Even though my day went horrible, right before we went outside and discovered the rain, we decided to sign her shirt! There was a ton of paint and markers, I wrote my name, "take care", "stay safe" "see you" and a ton of hearts... And the others wrote "gay hoe", "don't come back", "glad you're gone", "don't become a bitch", "stupid" and more stuff... And then we also just put paint everywhere... THEN we had a canvas which the others put their thumbprints onto, and then we also wrote some things about her... someone wrote "black magic", while I wrote "Jimmy Neutron" since she was the school topper since forever... This is a memory I hope I never forget lmao

okay now... anyways, now to the genshin stuff!! i might've been wishing on the mualani banner for kachina cons... ended up getting c4 (I think) Xinyan, c1 Bennett, and.... MUALANI?????????? yeah she kind of came out of NO WHERE considering I was on 30 pity... Without guarantee... NOW ALL MY VENTI AND HEIZOU SAVINGS ARE DEMOLISHED. joking she's really cute and I love her sharky shark shark playstyle :3 also yes I haven't gotten a single Kachina con yet...

natlan is so good 9.5/10 recommended but not enough capybaras. I LOVE YOUUUU TAKE CARE!!!!!!! GRRRRR >:[

so!! this blog was originally going to be about how lonely i feel but let me just explain what happened today at 4AM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so... I woke up at 4AM randomly (1 hour before my alarm too) and I realised I was starving and literally in utter agony. I ate a biscuit and though the acidity somewhat settled down... My abdomen was on basically fire???? It was HARD to not cry and I had no idea why this was happening. I thought it was some otherwordly period cramps so I moved but there's no blood stains so it couldn't be that... Then I thought it was because I exercised so much yesterday or some cramp but it felt more than that.. It was kind of muscular but I couldn't tell. Even after a trip to the bathroom it was agonising, no change whatsoever... Like that painful to the point where you continue to just scream, you can't keep your mouth shut at all. Luckilyy when I called ma she was awake too for some reason, and I sat on my bed in sheer horror at what's happening. We got a heating bottle I use in periods but it just... moved the pain to the right? Fyi it was hurting at the centre of the whole abdominal, lower middle and upper. It wasn't gaseous, I'm SURE of it....so what the hell was it??? It got so bad I was gonna be rushed to the ER, but I took some painkillers which I hadn't grown immune to yet (I am immune to most over-the-counter painkillers because I had to take lots as a tiny kid!!) and after like an hour and 30 minutes it was slowly getting bearable... I ended up fainting and woke up hours later.

The pain isn't exactly gone now, nor is it there... It keeps coming back, I took a second dose some minutes ago, but oh my goddd I probably exercised myself too much yesterday... everything hurts, especially my shoulders if I move them too extremely... Mother wanted me to go get an ultrasound, but she quickly lost interest... Oh and I also got my hair 'trimmed' and by trimmed I mean IT'S CUT TOO SHORT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ALL MY HAIR GROWTH IS GONE i am in agony. also father is being a manchild again but that's no new news

hehe... new news... YOU BETTER be staying safe reader!!!! Take care, love you ^0^

thank you educational instructor for giving us a PSA on not having gfs and bfs and relationships before marriage and making it definitely not uncomfortable!!! not at all!! definitely wasn't an unrelated topic!!!! totally!!!! can you tell moon is sarcastic yet reader. moon is very sarcastic. she wants to curl up and evaporate

we can't have a relation before marriage, but... may i hold ur hand bbg..... im joking ily reader i'm so sor

a dookdook a day keeps the constipation at bay

the more you know

Yesterday was WILD!!! well... kind of!!!! Let me explain :333333

The only class we had was Robotics!! I did go to biology, but we did nothing in there... BUT. They did have balloons in a jar......... now moon gained +1 BALLOON (ORANGE) :3

Asides from that!! We had to watch a movie in the auditorium... It was supposed to be a surprise but one of the teachers spilled it on Thursday LMAOO So erm... time to ramble about the movie because Moon actually liked it!!

So the movie was True Spirit :3 It's based on Jessica Watson's journey anddddd... I was the only one actually paying attention there TT everyone was talking between themselves or just doing something else.. i don't know why!?!?!??!?!?!? I personally enjoyed it a lot... It's probably something Moon's mom would like to watch too, so we decided we'll watch it together!! One day. Some day. Don't know which day. Maybe today???? ehe~

also help mom just made a call consisting of "Hello! [2sec Pause] Okay, talk to you later!" BADLY TRANSLATED. IT SOUNDS FUNNIER IN MY LANGUAGE MOON PROMISES

ps can someone throw away my biological manchild dad into a trashbin thanks!! also i finally uploaded not a short vid onto my yt lmao round of applause!!!

Might've forgotten to do dailies yesterday... NOOOOOOO but erm stay safe reader mwaaa :3

WOW THIS WAS A BIG DAY. AND SO WAS YESTERDAY. Okay to sum yesterday all up, Moon had to say goodbye to her cousin who's going out of city for a few years because of Uni!! Say bye bye to her reader :3

SO ANYWAYS!! Asides from that... Even though yesterday was HUGE, today was too!! Whole new classes... But. I'll cut it down into small bits!!! So ermrmrm chronological order :3333333333333

It was SUPER hot (like everyday but ermr) and... OK. SO. Like it was 9 AM and Moon was living off 4 hours of sleep and... HER CLASSMATE RANDOMLY YELLED "HEY GIRLIES" and she spun around SO fast to figure out if Childe had invaded the building or something.......... unfortunately he... did not... :(

NEXT EVENT!!! Once, no idea what was happening (but it was silly), three of her classmates randomly got up and started having banter... AND THEY LEGIT. LEGIT stood up and pointed at each other like that one spiderman meme and I CACKLEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. like literally the same pose and all unintentionally (Moon was high off 4 hours of sleep)

NOW. The negatives... Moon's spine starting hurting really bad, especially her neck area? Like, to the point she had to try not to cry. It also happened the most when she was walking around and standing with a bag on her shoulders and it hurt TONS. Even aside from that, we had to take many staircases today, and Moon's feet are so sore... Her body is so sore... Reader... help... spoil me to make me feel better!!!!! :33333333 (JOKING!!! unless..??)

But... At least we had cooking to do today!! Moon made cookies with her classmates :3 she took two home and is gonna gift them to her parents!! They were plain and choco hehe... ALSO. Since we had to tie aprons each time in cooking, Moon put an apron on... Last time, three months ago, she couldn't wrap it around herself twice unlike most of her classmates... BUT GUESS WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE CAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the exercises and all the effort is working. moon is gonna cry so hard and bad oml oml. She tied a knot behind her as she usually does (or.. psst, actually, moon doesn't know how to tie knots, keep this a secret reader... just between us...), then she got curious... AND SHE COULD WRAP IT AROUND HERSELF!!! She tied a knot in the front... So so happy... So happy (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄)

So... Asides from that... Remember to cherish yourself, okay, reader? You matter, trust Moon! Hope you drank water and ate properly... Rest too! Moon is here for you. ^^

one day, soon, it will be over soon. please let it be over. it will be over.

OMG OMG SO I GOT 400+ SUBS AND I GOT TO AR56!!!!! moon is too tired to write more, she feels very feverish (slept 5 times today) and her period isn't helping... AT LEAST KABUKIMEOW IS THERE!!!!

Also Moon started playing Minecraft again :3 She keeps switching between Java and Bedrock, but both versions are fun giggle giggle

Love love love reader!!!!

YIPPIE do not question where i've been all these days

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY HEIZOUUUUU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!! ok that's the whole post WISH HIM A HAPPY BIRTHDAY, READER!!! GRRRRR!!! god it's 1 am

moon will post more later... stay safe, reader! love you!

WOWOOWOWOWOWOWO OKAYYYY DAMN. THIS WAS A TON. Moon shall do a brief summary of her birthday~

Ok.. From what I can remember... FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVERRRR, THERE WILL BE MUSIC THERE'LL BE LIFE sorry that was so cringe but i for some reason remembered frozen. i had to do it reader. be free, be cringe. ANYWAYS it was a good birthday somehow!?!?!? So... I actually bought some presents for myself earlier... Like months earlier... Basically... Kazu keychain and bookmark...... Venti Earrings........ Wanwan plush, pins, and keychain... Xiao keychain... Aether brooch... Heizou poster... oh goodness the brainrot is strong. I ate a milk cake for my birthday instead of a cheesecake, and it was yummy! I also met two friends, and... I remember this one dude with a Wanderer pfp wanting to join me with the name "FearME" but i was still processing it so I wonder how everything would've gone if I did tbh. Honestly one of the most Wanderer things I've seen. BUT. honestly I felt so numb sometimes, kept having panic attacks. I'm having panic attacks so many times... Anyways, I also ate dinner! And I'm off discord hiatus now! And... ANd... ERM... ummmmmmmm... i'm depressed what the hell happened to me

i'm so fat, oh god i'm so ugly i'm so disgusting i'm so. why am i this? Like, this? Something's wrong, but i don't know it. i'm so tired, i don't know how to vent at this point. i exercise, i drink green tea, fill myself with water and yogurt. i love looking at cosplays, but i get upset. i love commenting on my friends whenever they send a pic, but i get upset. i wish i could send a picure of my hands, but i can't. i've been age regressing so bad, so so bad, it hurts. should i continue on like this? also side note i have so much homework it hurts getting through all of this AAAAAAA

that was unfortunately depressing, sorry reader... love you, okay? Take care of yourself!

GOODBYE WHY ARE MY FRIENDS TELLING ME THEY READ THIS OSGJIOSRHIOPSRKHEPKSW READER HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP STOPSTOP THIS IS MORE EMBARRASSING THAN IT SHOULD BE... MY FRIENDS READ THIS? ALL OF MOON'S UNCOVERED FEELINGS? I'VE BEEN TOO BURNT OUT TO MAKE AN AFTER BIRTHDAY POST, BUT WHAT THE HELL

NAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW cuz if any of you are out there reading this. BOO. SHOOOOOOO!! OFF, I SAY! OFF!!! EMBARRASSING!!! (ok no you can actually read this as much as you want ily but it's just really embarrassing for moonie so please tell her gently if you ever will)

reader if you don't headpat me in 5 seconds i will explo *boom*

THAT'S IT LMAO IT'S MY BIRTHDAY ILY READER I'LL SUMMARIZE TOMORROW

THERE'S... ONE DAY LEFT... WHATTTTTTT??? nonoonononoo reeeeewind... rewind... REWIND!! REWIND RIGHT NOWWW I wanna be 10 again... it's too tough getting older... take me backkkk to the happier days!!! i mean i had severe depression when i was 10 but still... they were happier!! i guesssss i should make tomorrow special. Good thing is I'm gonna use my Kabukimeow plushie!! So many cuddles... Just hope I don't start to chew on him from cute aggression... mwahahahaha :3

Time to summarize the past days... I went to Grandma's! I talked a lot with my cousin, and I played cards with her too! Usually my cousins and uncles play cards with eachother, and this is the first time I've done it in years... Maybe last time was... When I was 10? 11? No clue! Anyways~ We played two rounds since I had to get going home (it was getting late), soo... I lost the first round!! My cousin actually told me she barely managed to save herself from loss multiple times hehehehe... Then I won the second round! I wanted to play more, but I forgot my phone charger at home, and my phone's battery was 11%, so I wanted to leave really quickly... I showed my aunts and cousins a book I bought too! It's a small story about a dog's life, I haven't begun reading it (only a few first pages), but I will soon, hopefully! I THINK I'm going to go today, too! Oh my, this week is busy~~... Once again, my Grandma's place! I lowkey prefer my maternal family more than paternal... Don't tell my parents, ok, reader? Ehehehehe!!!

now... FOR VENTILATOR!! I MEAN VENTI. LATE HAPPY BIRTHDAY VENTIII I MADE A YT POST WISHING YOU A HAPPY BIRTHDAY AT LIKE 12 AM BUT I COULDN'T MAKE A BLOGPOST BECAUSE I WAS TOO LAZY TO CODE THISSSS RAHHH I'M SO SORRYYYY FORGIVE ME POOKIE... I'm gonna make Venven's birthday art soon tho!! Maybe today if I'm not busy, maybe tomorrow, no idea... I'm happy that Venti and mine's birthdays are three days apart tho hehe it's so cuteee meant to be!! (I am so deluded send help) But ahhh Venti is so cute... Come home, Venven, come home! I'm awaiting your rerun!! knowing Genshin, it's probably in 2025... Ughh they should have 3 banner reruns at the same, we're getting too many 5 stars in Fontaine!! Ah yes, the Genshin favourite child...

but if I'm going to be honest... these days have been really bad. last week, this week. I think my mental health just went boom on me, I've been having strong depressive episodes everyday... And I got some panic attacks as well. Mostly because my dad wanted to go somewhere new, so he took me to this mall. First red flag was that the basement was wayyyyyyyy underground with too many steep dips. The second was that... There was no door!? I instantly began hyperventilating when I realised there was no physical swinging door to enter and exit the building, only elevators, and like... what typa distopian dookie is this... Never again!! After almost crying we went outside and I bought a book then probably got food poisoning from the spiciest chicken I've ever ate. Goodness me... I can't properly eat anything, but whatever. Cute Wanwan dude and my bff have been also really busy with work and Irl matters (most likely), so I have barely anyone to talk to... Maybe everything will get better on my birthday, but knowing how every birthday has gone, it'll be... Lonely and irriating. Maybe I should make friends Irl, but I'm scared. No one wants to be willingly around me, my classmates had no choice to, and family is just family. I always don't know how to feel about the 18th and 20th of June. One is before my existence, one is after my existence. Should I have existed? Sometimes I feel like I have no friends, just acquaintances putting up with me, including my best friends. That's why I barely talk to anyone anymore, I don't text first because everyone found me annoying and too clingy and childish. But now since I never come online, people think I don't care about them anymore? I don't even have a reason to not care about anyone. I just hope things will get better tomorrow, I'm going to stop my hiatus, but it's gonna be annoying since I have to respond to a lot of dms... Most people unfriended me anyways though, so it's fine. I probably care too much, hehe. My current meaning in life is to place building blocks for my future self, after all. Otherwise, I have no purpose. Also, the people who drove me off platform probably forgot about me now... Good! I didn't even do anything, but that's fine. I just feel a little empty now. I hope I'm not here for too long.

love you reader... Take care! I hope you wished Venti a happy birthday... Happy belated birthday Ventipoo!!! ^^

GRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WE'RE SO gone I'm gone I'm going bye bye reader I'm GOING. 8 DAYS UNIL MY BIRTHDAY!?!?!? LEAVE. I DON'T WANNA GROW UP STOP THIS TORTUREEEE UGHHHHH i'm about to crawl under my skin SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. WHY IS IT GOING SO SOOOOOON UNFAIR UNFAIR UNFAIR. I NEED TO DO MY ART WORKS QUICKLY BEFORE I GROW UP OR THEY WON'T BE AS IMPRESSIVE ANYMORE. ugh ugh ugh whatever time to summarize the eventful days...

so erm :3 I actually DID PULL SETHOS, C1!!! I didn't have Thoma or Bennet too, AND I GOT THEM RAHHHHH!!! I ALSO GOT A WIDSTH!! I put it on my Wanwan because it matches him instead of refining it or putting it on my Yanfei lmao hehe. ALSo I'M DEVASTED I DID A WEEKLY BOSS WITH WANWAN IN MY TEAM SO I CAN GET THE FRIENDSHIP EXP. IT GAVE HIM 400 CHAR EXP. I'M CRYING Lacy did this I'm never speaking to him ever again Ion need no mentor dawg. I'm a lone wolf. woof woof bark bark (see? Wolf!!!!) BUT I ALSO GOT C4 YANFEI NOW... also I've been helping newbies :3 like newbies newer than me. ALSO I GOT 3 REGIONS IN MONDSTADT TO 100% EXPLORATION!! AND I GOT THE FROSTBEARING TREE TO LEVEL 8!!! This is all thanks to Alex who somehow has 100% exploration on everything... I mean everything. Sumeru. Enkanomiya. The Chasm. Literally everywhere. I'm scared of him. BUT THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME 100% AND GET DRAGONSPINE TO 80% LMAOOOO I really want the snowy glider :( Idk who I'll put it on... I just need it yk???? WAIT I COULD PUT IT ON LAYLA. SHE'D LOOK FABULOUS. IT WOULDN'T LOOK TOO BAD ON QIQI AND LYNETTE TOO. LUMINE WOULD LOOK GOOD TOO. AUHGUGUHGHUGHGUHUG this is what dressing up does to a Mooncake. lmao no wonder I fully decked out my Serenitea Pot MWEHEHEHEHHEHE I'm so sorry I just love things like that... AND WHY DOES THE NEW EVENT GIVE SO MANY PRIMOS i'm giggling i'm inlove with the new bow too... but I hope we get more magical girl weapons (specifically a sword, 2 catalysts, and 1 bow. ifykyk) I really need to up my magical girl collection... ehe~

OK I NEED TO TALK ABOUT CUTE WANWAN NOW. yeah a whole ahh diff paragraph just for him because oml the days have been EVENTFULLLL and he's nice so he deserves it. ok???? SO BASICALLY we were talking about our lives and mostly culture things... he taught me some stuffs and I went like 'oooooooooooo' because that's my default response but trust Moonmoon she is very invested. I learned a lot!! THEN he taught me that 달 means moon... And then he called me 다라... And then he went like "Yoimiya is a lovely girl, like Dala" and I NEARLY CRIED HELP HE'S TOO SWEET!!! I managed to finally open up a little to him since he talked about his life and problems to me... Maybe I shouldn't have my walls so high? No, it's for my own protection... Anyways!!! He tells me how curious he is about where I live since I've only told him my region... So I went like 'FINEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuh' and I showed him some stuff... When we went to Sumeru he constantly told me about how he finds the carpets everywhere so pretty, and told me how they're usually 1000 USD... I WAS SHOOK. DO CARPETS REALLY GO FOR THAT MUCH??? Then I told him that the big ones downstairs I got in the living room would probably be... ~65k Won. He said that was cheap as HELL and how he wants to visit here LMAOOOO I giggled sooooooooo loud at that one. And then after that, I showed him how the carpets usually look where I live... He said they were amazing... So I showed him more of my culture!! Like how the markets look like, the food we eat, how we dress (tradionally) on formal and fancy occasions... He said it was like Nilou's outfit BAHAHA I see the similarities~ He said that the architexture here was really unlike anything he's seen before, and he's really interested! This is the first time I've ever appreciated my culture LMAOOO ugh it felt so good... I showed him Peanut and Butter too!! And I'm gonna show him Shaggy and hopefully Tinki and Blossom too soon!! SPEAKING OF SHAGGY, I WENT TO MY GRANDMA'S SAME DAY (Sunday) I TOLD HIM ABOUT MY CULTURE!! It was kinda fitting since we were having a feast, so I could show him some of the traditional food that I was having too... He shows me the traditional cusine he has sometimes, and it looks so pretty and yummy! At this point we're just trading knowledge of our cultures hehe it's fun! He also asked about my English and... I mean... This is what you get when you live eat and breathe on the English internet!! He keeps insulting his English but I think it's good because he's able to hold lengthy convos :( Literally we sometimes play and talk for hours... He shouldn't downplay himself... It hurts :((( BUT. BEST PART OF ALL OF THIS? I'M OFFICIALLY HIS GENSHIN BEST FRIEND HUZZZZZZZZAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! it's cute how he considers me his genshin bestie lol he also flexxed his Chlorine— sorry CLORINDE in my world too... aaaaah and then I showed him some funny things in Sumeru! And he played a small freestyle song on the trumpet it was so nice... WHY IS HE SO NICE I DON'T DESERVE THISSSSS WAAAAAAAAAAAAH he should find a better friend than me TT Dal isn't good enough for anyone... he's been busy last week and this week so we could only talk on weekends, even tho he's done with his work lol. At least I got him to use Discord mwahahahahahaha HE ALSO CALLED ME SMART BECAUSE OF MY SITE AND CODING SKILLS I BLUSHED. wait. he knows of my site now. OH GOD WHAT IF HE FINDS MY BLOG NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HE BETTER NOT READ THIS. hey Winwin if you're reading this. you didn't. ok? forget everything... shh... PLEASE DO AND DO NOT TELL ME WHATSOEVER THAT YOU EVER READ THIS THIS IS SO EMBARRASSSINGGGGG.

with that out of the way... My cousin had a surgery! I won't tell what bc privacy, but he's now fighting an infection... mannn :( I hope he's okay.. I met him Sunday and he was doing better tho! My mom, cousins, and uncle played Tekken 3 with him because that's our collective childhood game lol we all love it!! Haah~~ The day was fun but I got self conscious again... Everyone is so slim except me... but if I continue to drown in this, Moon will just feel like 'woe is me'... I'll stop thinking about it then~ I might create a new page on this sight to document my plushies! ... 80+ plushies... dear God... I have to name them all too... Lord in the heavens above, save me... Also, we got Holiday Homework now... boohoo... It's mostly graphics designing on various subjects tho, so it'll be fine. EXCEPT ENGLISH. WHAT MOVIE DO I USE TO MAKE A POSTER FOR??? AMERICAN PYSCHO??? PLEASE I'LL BE SUSPENDED IF I DO THAT AND PROBABLY TAKEN TO A HOSPITAL. I HAVE NOTHINGGGG IN MIND I'M DOOMED. READER HELPPPPP KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO MEEEEEE, GO PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH ON MY BRAIN!! hEIZOU PUNCH, HHUUUUWAH also. I'm depressed again. my Heizou simp classmate doesn't simp for Heizou anymore. SHE SIMPS FOR ALEX TURNER. I MEAN, I'M NOT THE ONE TO JUDGE PEOPLE'S TASTES, BUT... ALEX TURNER??? ykw I'm just gonna... shhh myself... but we have amazing tastes, right, reader? ^0^ (I say, barely being attracted to literally anyone)

wow~ Eventful day... I'll post something on my art blog soon, hopefully... Love you reader! Remember to drink water, and do my homework for me hehehehe...

So I was on Snapchat, looking at my classmates' groupchat before calling it a day and heading to sleep... That's when I saw someone ask others if they've seen their results on the app, and they responded yes... That's where I gasped. I instantly checked the app no matter how much my heart felt like it was burning, and I was oh so ready to fall into tears as I immediately saw my status on my final exams...

I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED I PASSED!!!!!

OK... TIME TO SLEEP... BUT MY ANXIETY HAS TURNED INTO EXCITEMENT AND I CAN'T SLEEP. reader please read me a bedtime story :3 yay thank you mwa

I hope I pull Sethos without getting a 5 star~ I LOVEEEEE LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU READER!!! Goodnight (๑'ᴗ')ゞ

i don't know why but ever since yesterday i've been basically becoming a doomer. my exam results are tomorrow and I'm crying what if I fail and don't pass??? This is my whole life this is the only reason I live for and it is to excell in my academic studies. And what if I don't even do that, what if I have to repeat this year??? I literally cannot let that happen reader. I can't stop feeling so bad it hurts so so so much. I'm so scared because I think I might fail in maths... and that's an obligatory subject. I left 3 questions... Sure, I wrote formulas for 2 of them, but that's just a few marks. ok as I'm typing this I got Kazuha to level 10 friendship finally and it makes me feel better but I think your exam results which can define your future overshadows getting your fav to a max level... I love you so much Moon's strawberry cheesecake pookie, but this is my LIFE and I DO touch grass. anyways I'm gonna cry maybe probably definitely. WHICH IS FUNNY BECAUSE I CRIED TODAY BECAUSE OF HOW DISGUSTING MY BODY IS i'm about to. I don't even know at this point... I'm doing everything healthy in my life (exercising, eating right, consuming healthy things that boost metabolism, taking cold showers, always taking stairs, literally not eating meals straight) so why can't I not be chubby??? YES last time I checked I have lost a crap ton of weight but it's not ENOUGH. It's too slow, I hate it, I don't like it, I just want to be like the other girls... Every second that passes makes me miss out on not being discriminated against and holy hell. I'm doing my best to study and be healthy because I want to be a better version of myself not only for me but for societal pressure and to be actually treated ok in life. It's not like I made myself get fat, it's my parents, literally feeding me the most vile stuff when I was 2. It's not even my fault but now I have the responsibility to get rid of it. I'm so weak for crying oh my goodness. that... doesn't apply to you btw reader. Don't you dare ever tell anyone that they're weak for expressing emotions, okie? Goodie!

Asides from that... Why am I so lonely this week? Why do my friends keep leaving me on read so suddenly? What did I do? I'm trying to figure it out, I'm trying to find out my wrongings but... I can't find anything wrong. Mostly because I'm the only one talking to them and they haven't responded for days... There's not anything to be upset at, I think and hope... It's just one message and they left it on read... Or ignore me blatantly... What have I done??? I'm sorry for what I did but what have I done??? How can I right my wrongs??? What did I do??? I just want to know what I did wrong... i just want to be good to my friends. i'm so tired and quite frankly it's annoying but i hate myself for what i've done. readerrr... you won't ever leave me on read, right?????? rightttt??? you're my reader of courseee you wouldn'ttttt... right.

Whatever... That's enough of that... I would give some good news but there literally isn't any. And my touch trigger has been worse, specifically my dad is making it worse. So you know how I only allow people to touch my head and headpat me, right?? Dude he's doing it SO aggressively and SO often that it's literally making me want to scratch my skin off. oml I'm so close to crying again. This is funny because I had a nightmare today about mi papa and I can barely remember its plot but i know he wasn't being good towards me or my family teeheehee... I love how my birth month has only been dookie this far!! I can't WAIT on how it'll be on my birthday!! WOWWW. I just hope I get Sethos on the new banner tomorrow and don't get any 5 stars (and if I do, it better be an early pull)...

I know you'll always be there for me reader, but sometimes I doubt it... Not that Moonie will stop loving you all the same!! Never, everrr~~~ Keep on staying healthy :3

Making it quick because Moon is going to sleep~ I GOT CUTEWANWAN'S DISCORD!! We haven't talked but I'm gonna spam my Wanwan drawings in his face mwehehe.... What if he checks out my blog oh God... Speaking of drawings, I don't think I've mentioned how I got called a faker for stealing....... My own drawing? It was on yt shorts, never again, all I did was a trend... Thinking about it... Though I posted proof, what if they kept harassing me or tried to look for la original?

ALSO... props to my mom for reaching work at 12 and coming home at 3PM. She must've worked hard in those 2 hours. Such a hardworking woman... Made 3 reports, each in 10 minutes, and spent rest of the 1 and a half hours browsing the internet 🙏 we need more people like her. 😇 BUT FR HER EXCUSE WAS "I'm the manager, I don't do work, others send me their work" LIKE MOM YOU'RE THE DEPUTY NOT THE MANAGER YET MOM. jokes aside she does do a good work at her job yayyy

I THINK THAT'S IT, ALL I CAN REMEMBER... and my memory is badddd so :3 I wish I could forget how much I struggled on getting that one geoculus with CuteWanwan... 6 TRIES. I struggled SO BAD to the point he called me CUTE. it took my all to not cry right there and then... but yay my liyue statue is max now :3 onto inazuma. oh... and i hate my birth month. growing up is terrifying.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAIMON AND ITTO!!! UNHAPPY BIRTH MONTH ME!! ALSO MY HEIZOU SIMP FRIEND IS DOWNLOADING GENSHIN YAYY... LOVE YOU READER, MY SWEETEST READER!!! mwa mwa mwa, take care~

OK... HIII!! SO NOW I HAVE TWO DAYS TO SUMMARIZE... ARRRRGH OH WELL

so... we had a party ereyesterday and it was super fun :3 we took pics, we ate brownies, we ate pizzas, we ate chips, we ate basically everything unhealthy on the table and we gossiped. A LOT. 4 of my classmates were writing on eachothers' shirt, and... this reminds me... WHY DO I KEEP GETTING REMINDED OF SCARAMOUCHE??? Literally one of my classmates name is similar to 'Scara' and one of my classmates called her and I was like "WHAT? WE'RE TALKING ABOUT GENSHIN NOW?" (no one here knows about Genshin)... and then EREYESTERDAY I don't know who said what but I just remember accidentally hearing "The Balladeer" and it was a JUMPSCARE AND A HALF in itself...

The brainrot MAY be sprialing out of control... oh well :3 hehehe... BUT THAT'S ENOUGH ABOUT EREYESTERDAY!!! (mostly because I can't remember anything else... oopsiessss) NOW YESTERDAY TALK!! MWAHAHHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH so so so... it was really fun!! we got there in afternoon but it was fine, I played with Shaggy a bit then went inside since it was SCORCHING... they had a weird maid who was rambling about how i should've been a boy (to my mom) and we all (meemaw, aunt, me, mom) just got the ick from her and literally sighed a breath of relief when she went away...

ANYWAYS, then my mom and my uncle played a bit of Tekken 2 on the TV!! then my mom and my aunt called him using meemaw's phone (since he wasn't picking up ma's phone) and did a really bad impression of her... It was silly! THEN THANKFULLY my cousins and other aunty came by! They stayed the whole time and it was funny because... Because... my sister cousin made me draw Iron Man on my new sketchbook for the first artpiece... and I did............ and I put a tutu skirt on him

AHEM so... then my brother cousin and uncle played Tekken too.. dude they're just sticking to a few set of moves it was really funny LMAOOOOOOOOO we then ate some rice we had for lunch before (it was rlly yummy) and and anddd... BASICALLY talked a lot with my cousins, it was fun broo ughhhhh you should've been there

... also... LIFE ANSWERED MY PRAYERS!! I MET A NICE WANDERER MAIN YESTERDAY AND TAMED THEM!!! well they were obviously still a Wanderer main so they had just "God" as their bio and their Wanderer literally killed the Raiden Shogun boss in 10 seconds without using burst, and without me doing any major help (because she was already down half hp by the time I loaded in... scary...) I met them by joining their world, asking if they need anything (AR60 ppl still could need help smh) and they went like "Nope. I'm strong." so I challenged them to show me and they killed 10 bosses under 15 minutes. I was SCARED. THOSE WHO SAY WANDERER ISN'T META ANYMORE ARE FAKERS!!!! HE IS TERRIFYING WHEN BUILT PROPERLY... or maybe he just weaponized his mommy issues on the shogun boss because his sister looks like their mom, who knows, probably... probably was that, if Moon'll be honest... also actually there was an automatic first greenflag when we met. Because the first thing we did was chase each other around using Wanderer and Nahida :3 like going around in circles hehe

but then they got romantical with my Nahida. I'M KIDDING but they did something rlly cute today like do the Liyue heart chest with me and we took several pics (ofc I was Nahida and they were Wanderer) :333333 and then and then we did the Fontaine heart plant chest too!!! I recorded that one :3 UGHHH and we also killed a Fatui couple and we killed the robot couple boss twice... and then they took me to stargaze in Mondstadt, we climbed the church and stared at the stars while we talked about important and deep things... Like the stars disappearing where we live............ and curry... we both like chicken

ANYWAYS they earned the title of me naming them 'cutewanwan' in my friendslist (no they don't know please don't tell them) and I hope we are friends for a long time!! YIPPIE THANK YOU GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!

so das it :3 yeh

live... laugh... love... Wanderer (and reader!!!!!!!!!) I LOVE YOUUUUU

I DID IT. MY EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER. AUGHGHGHGHHGH 2 MONTH BREAK!!! YAYYYYY MWAHAHAHHAHAHA I AM FREEEE!!! (why the hell is this break so short? ours is usualy 3 months or more... it's literally a heatstroke left and right, 45d C today, it felt like 51d C, whenever i get in the car i can feel myself being cooked alive ^v^ lordddd screw this...)

AH, WELL! We had a small end party today in our classroom and it just involved eating so many things LOL I honestly was cranky because I felt so ugly compared to my classmates... they all looked so pretty and I just looked like Penelope from Wreck it Ralph 😭 (literally my classmate CALLED ME THAT)

I'm soooooo burnt out I wanna wrote about everything that happened today but I'm so tired... I'll write yesterday :3 hehhehehehehhe

DON'T BURN!! STAY HYDRATED!!! SCREW THESE DRAUGHTS AND HEATWAVES, READER!!! RAHHHH

I GOT WANDERER AT 11 PITY!!! I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I GOT WANDERER I DID IT I DID IT I DID IT I GOT HIM!!! FINALLY HE CAME HOME, YAYYYYYYY!!!! I'M GONNA DO MY BEST TO GET HIM (and kazuzu) TO LVL 10 FRIENDSHIP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!! THE THREE EMOS ARE HAVING A TEA PARTY IN MY SERENITEA POT WITH NAHIDA BECAUSE THEY CAN!!!! OOOOOOOORAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH YESSIRRRRR

Oh and I got Kaveh too on standard banner :3 I wish I got Heizou but... Kaveh's gotten nearly 20 banners without a feature so I think I'm pretty lucky somehow 😭 thank you world, I will not use him to scare others if they believe hacked Kaveh still exists!!!

Small note, reader... I've not been able to eat today :( just an apple (I'm so Venti rn) and some biscuits, that's it... I think it's because my maths exam is tomorrow and I might fail, I'm so scared, I don't wanna fail... I know the formulas, but I'm so behind in calculation... And I constantly daydream when I'm stressed out, too... It's gonna hurt... I'll fail this... My whole future will be impacted by this, Moon is so scared... And my bff hasn't talked to me in a month tho I did try messaging them... I'm worried, but they might just not want to talk to me specifically, so I'm seeing if I did something wrong, or maybe they're just very busy, so I hope work isn't too hard on them... All Moon wants is happiness for everyone :( ahhh... Good news, at least... Only 5 more exams... Aaaah.... This next week will hurt so bad... I'm gonna fail....

so... Have fun, reader!! Always value your friendships, especially close, because you never know when you'll be nostalgic of them! And... Goodluck on any exam! I love you ^^

I lost Wanderer to Qiqi on 87 pity

bye

reader i'm gonna be real with you i'm on the verge of having a mental breakdown as much as i dislike portraying my negative emotions. my exams are starting tomorrow and even tho I studied for 7 hours straight today I think I'll fail and if anything I might be able to get passing marks and that's it. If I don't pass this year I think I can't take it anymore LMAOAOOAOAOAOOOAOAO

my parents are also giving me a headache because they can't seem to act like, yk, mature adults that they are actually supposed to be??? Why the hell is their daughter more logical and mature than the parents??? I'm just happy little girl 7 year old something me stopped idolizing them... probably was younger, tho...

also dude I just ruined my life. I was on Genshin and I tried wishing for Wanderer (~82 pity) and I didn't get him but I did get my first c6, Faruzan... and I got c1 Layla, c0 Beidou... and so I saw this one Wanderer pfp person with "85/180" in their bio and was intrigued (or confused) because I wanted to know if it was their pity... Turns out, it was!!! They're trying for Shenhe... I joined, helped them farm to triple crown Wanderer, and we ended up having a nice chat!! it was nice, I think that was the first Wanderer main to not insult me or make any mocking point out about me maining/kinning radish (Nahida), they were really nice... they said Moon was really nice... I think they're really nice!!! We made some jokes even tho we didn't play for long

but I'm sad. very mad at Moon. She wanted to friend the Wanderer but she felt too timid to ask so she sent a request after we left co-op... and I don't think they're gonna accept... I don't know!! It's just the Nahida kinnie in Moon trying to make friends with a Wanderer kinnie :((( I reallyy wanted to be their friend... ughhhghhghghg I hate this... My only irl friend is going to another country, we were only friends for a few months... And most of those days, either one of us was absent... We didn't talk to each other a whole lot sometimes, too... And my bff hasn't talked to me in almost a month... i know it's a me problem but I don't know what i did :( moon knows she did something wrong but she doesn't even know what it exactly is, she wants to identify it but she doesn't know how!!

So... that's it for now, I guess... um also I was the only one present in my class today... It was crazy.. we ended up merging most classes together because maybe 19 from my total group arrived

so, that's it, reader!! drink water, stay safe, and no matter how upset i am i'll always find a way to love you <3 and if you're that Wanderer main (or any nice Wanderer playing on Asia server) please friend Moonie... 🙏 (if you want, no forcing!!)

LAST GRAND TEST HEHEHHEHE WRITING THIS IN THE MORNING <3333 It's still an hour from school!! I woke up at 3 AM lol early... I was late yesterday because I woke up at 5 so I guess this is compensation wwwwww but exams are in 5 days o-o

Asides from that... FIRST THINGS FIRST, GENSHIN!! So I'm doing the Arataki Gang Rock 'n' Roll event quest and it's SO FUN??? hehe Heizou is there <333 and Gorou!!!!!!!! and omg THOMA TOO the bestest malewife... Now, asides from the pretty boys, guess what reader.... you WON't guess... I GOT TO AR55!!! FINALLY!!!! I'VE BEEN PLAYING FOR LIKE I GUESS SOMEWHAT MORE THAN 3 MONTHS AND OMG FINALLYYYY Lacy wanted me to get there so I could steal his materials BAHAHHAAH ever seen a newbie steal from a veteran? Also his Arle is somehow TOP 4 IN OVERLOAD WHEN IT'S NOT EVEN AN OVERLOAD BUILD? I'm kinda scared of him... he's such a nice mentor :) though Room and Redact keep making fun of my radish build... ughhhghghghhhh q-q i also need like 3 more dendroculi but i can't find any easy ones...

BUT... Okay, let me ramble a bit on this new event rq... Room finds it boring since it's too easy but I find it HARD... I mean, probably since I don't play pjsk unlike him... I got 0 fails, 17 goods, and 67 perfects with a 208 combo on Parousia Diluvi... I DIDN'T EVEN DO THAT ON SURASTHANA FANTASIA, maybe this is how Neuvi mains feel like... BUT ASIDES FROM THAT. I'M DOING THE SECOND PART OF THE QUEST... AND... THE WAY SHINOBU SENDS TRAVELLER TO TALK TO THE FRIENDS THAT CAME AT THE CELEBRATIONS FEELS AN AWFULLLLLL AWFULLLLLLL lot similar to my teachers telling me to go talk to my classmates at school events... Like I love them all I swear... but I do NOT want to stutter 6.87 times just saying "hi" bro like please leave me in peace...

.... I think that's all the Genshin things out of my system... ON TO THE SCHOOL THINGS!!! Now, yesterday was... Crazy, honestly. I would've made a blog post but I was studying (I was playing Genshin 24/7 and grinding primos and AR exp). Still... So, basically, a ton of dumb things happened (like us missing our PE and HMS classes because we took too long in maths lol AND our maths teacher put her feet on the chair and then was asking why we weren't sitting there like... for a GOOD reason!!) but one of the most notiable ones made me confused the most... So my classmates were reading a novel behind me and got interested because they kept going like "ewwww ew ew that's super gross!!" and like "eww why are they doing that?" and they were giggling a lot so Moon asked what they were doing! They said they were reading a bad part from a novel... When Mooncake asked to specify, they kept denying and saying I was too innocent?? like girl back off (`皿´＃)

Eventually they let me read one sentence... but I IMMEDIATELY stopped reading after I saw "he put his left hand on her waist" or something... yuckyyy and there was also something about a chicken? But I was so grossed out and asked why the HELL THEY WERE READING ROMANCE IN SCHOOL ON A PAPER NOVEL??? they just said it's fun torturing themselves. honestly, good point :3 They also asked what 69 was and I feel like i remember, but Moon's memory forgets about things at the most important time :( I can't remember. Like... It's a number?? and like girl stop saying I'm innocent it's getting annoying hearing that on repeat 24/7 💀 "Omg Moon you're so innocent and pure!!!" I will self destruct

Though, that's all I can remember from school now... I'll do the genshin event, record Heizou's interaction for my simping friend, and that's it :D

So, reader, remember to not read anything weird in class! ... Especially when the strict teacher is sitting behind you... Which, in their case, she was... Bye bye, take care!!!

WOWWWWWWW OKAY THAT WAS SOMETHING. THAT WAS DEFINITELY SOMETHING AND I HOPE I NEVER HAVE A PLAY EVER AGAIN. MY STAGE FRIGHT BUM CAN'T TAKE IT... reader.. i need a hug :(

So, we were supposed to get ready (change our clothes, do our hair, etc.) at ~8:40 AM... and so we did do that... but. The play started at 11. Do you want to know WHY??? because the LIGHTS WERE OUT FOR 2 AND A HALF HOURS STRAIGHT IN THIS SCORCHING HEAT!! at least i took a bath before school but... i honestly regret it... my mom encouraged me but my hair was SO frizzy!?!? mom said "oh it makes your hair fluffy, don't put oil," LIKE MOM!?!?!? stop being my DOWNFALL!! I also had to draw a small grassland area in like 2 minutes I'll hang it up hopefully here >,<;;

But... I need to talk about this one performance for a bit. Okay, so our play was actually basically presentations (but with style) so we could do anything, as long as it abided by the rules and followed the topic. Now, reader, Moon really wants you to tap into your imagination, okay? Hang on with me on this one... Hear Mooncake out...

Picture this. Selena Gomez, Hailey Bieber, Jojo Siwa, and Twilight Sparkle doing a presenation on Artic Tundras.

NO THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED THEY ACTUALLY PLAYED THESE ROLES IT WAS SO FUNNY I WAS CRYING IN THE AUDIENCE AAAAAAAAA like Hailey was just talking about the average temprature and Jojo interrupts singing "I WAS A BAD GIRL I DID SOME BAD THINGS" it was way too funny for my immature bum (everyone laughed im not the only immature one even the teachers thought it was funny... aside from the part where they told eachother to shut up, the head of staff got mad lmao) I'm still crying because she even wore an oversized sparkly rainbow pink bow MANNNNNNN

After the whole play we basically had freetime (though we completed some work too) and they were playing truth or dare (they played 2 truths 1 lie before this) and they literally dared the girl playing Jojo to sing Karma infront the whole class BAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH she was too embarrassed to do it tho so they did some other dare (she asked miss if she could drink water from the bathroom)... BUT SHE DID YELL THE STARTING OF THE SONG AT THE GIRL WHO DARED I NEARLY RUINED MY DRAWINGS BY LAUGHING TOO MUCHH AAAAA it's so rare to find fun in school but life is finally getting worth it :)

but... I'm still a bit upset. I've been dissasociating for maybe... Nearly a year straight... It all feels so weird. Maybe that's why I didn't give my best at the presentation? Sometimes, when life gets so, so painful, Moon just tries to find the pause button... Only to realise it's real life... And Moon isn't watching a movie... It's really weird, Moon can't properly explain it, Moon's only comfort comes from online games and friends at this point because she knows it's pixels on a screen... But real life feels like pixels on a screen, but it isn't. Moon is so scared.

Reader, Moon really wishes you were there, it was very funny. <3 except for the part where my group had to present... I'm GLAD you didn't watch me absolutely fail... Drink water (not from the BATHROOM) <3

OKAY WOW I MEANT TO MAKE A BLOGPOST SINCE MONDAY BUT I GOT TOO LAZY NOOOOOOOOOOOOO UHM UHM I'M GETTING LATE FOR SCHOOL SO... BLOG SPEEDRUN!!!

I HAVE A WHOLE PLAY TODAY!!?!? I'M SUPER SCARED, I'M SUPPOSED TO CHANGE IN THE SCHOOL BATHROOMS AND WEAR THE OUTFIT FOR THE REST OF THE DAY (since it's not a cosplay, just wearing regular other clothes) BUT LIKE. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M MAD ABOUT? THE WEATHER. IT'S LITERALLY SO HOT AND DRY AND I'M SOBBING LIKE UMMMMM... MOTHER NATURE IS NOT WORKING OUT FOR US!!

UHH... THAT'S KIND OF IT... I MIGHT POST ON MY ART BLOG AGAIN OF A SMALL DOODLE I DID, BUT THAT'S IT... ehuehuehu... i'm so tired... also i'm near 60 fates now :3 I REALLY hope I don't lose my 50/50!! asides from all of that my health has been dookie (again) and i feel like a dookdook. saying this i feel that dawg in me (but the dawg is Nahida) i love how she just casually talked about dookies with Traveller and Paimon

reader... pick me up after school and we'll go to like uhm somewhere. idk where you decide :3 Stay safe!!!!!!!!! Love you!!!

Imagine you're facetiming your mom (while she's at her work office cubicle) in the car after you've been picked up from school and she turns the camera to her screen. and she's searching about the AnEmo Protection Squad boys. and she's looking at 'why do people ship Xiao x Kazuha'.

hi, I'm Moon... and my life... is kinda crazy!!! (I'M SCREAMING I WAS ACTUALLY CRYING WAHT THE EHLLLLLL HOWWWW MOM?????????????? HELLO????????)

UM.. OK... I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ELSE TO WRITE... SO BASICALLY I'VE SAVED UP LIKE... NEARLY 40 FATES FOR WANDERER RIGHT NOW, BUT I'M SCARED. WHAT IF I LOSE 50/50 AGAIN. I'D FAINT, LITERALLY, I WOULD CUZ NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I'M GONNA LOSE AN EMO TWINK!!!!! Heizou pls be featured soon I want you so b ad.... waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa OH!! AND I MIGHT FINALLY POST ART ON MY ART BLOG, READER!! giggle giggle it's all genshin tee hee hee I'm becoming obsessed this isn't good 💀 readerrr~~~ save meeeeeeeee~~~ *sob* (yis yis yis I have the Xiao art ready :3)

AH... also... exam month has started. this sucks so much. I think I'm gonna evaporate into thin air... reader, you have to catch me into a jar, ok? good! (hahahahahhahahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahaha help)

AH. UM, UNRELATED... actaully no oopsies :3 but I've kinda... made my mom memorize the whole "Scaramouche Scaramouche will you do the fandango" part in Bohemian Rhapsody and we kinda sing it everywhere now... And lowkey I'm regretting because HELPPPPPP and I'm slowly tryna make my AnEmo simp classmate be addicted to it too fufufufufufu... I am so evil!!!!!!!!!!!!! (the most evil thing i've done is throw a pillow at my cousin) rahhh fear me!!! SCARAMOUCHE REINCARNATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH

reader. I ain't gon lie. I got like a billion things to say and I've only got like 2.68 remembered here. OH WE'RE HAVING A PLAY AND I'M LITERALLY SHAKING BECAUSE I HAVE TO BE ON STAGE... IT'S LIKE NEXT WEEK... NOOOOOOOOO EVERYONE'S GONNA BE JUDGING ME!?!?!??! PLEASEE SPARE, SPARE, SPARE!! but... at least the weather is cold, windy, and nice (let's pretend it wasn't scorching hot before the rainstorms), so it won't feel too bad~... <3

Also, Shaggy update that you love... he's HUGE now!! he's such a fluffy puppy and he jumped up and licked my whole face and I was too scared to move away TT I'll add pics soon!!! Maybe I should just create a whole new page and dedicate it to Shaggy... Or even all my pets... (and Tinki gave birth!! but we don't know what to name the three kittens.. me and ma were thinking Xiao, Heizou, and Wanderer...)

........... it feels like I'm forgetting something... Oh well, I'll post another blogpost if I have something to add~

so um... never tell your parents about the twinks you enjoy!! life lesson, reader, do not forget that! Okie? Dokie!

I GOT KAEDEHARA KAZUHA!!! I DID IT I DID IT I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I PULLED HIM I PULLED HIM HE CAME HOME AT 79 PITY ME AND MY MOM CRIED TEARS OF JOY I PULLED HIM I PULLED HIM!!!!! XIAO PROBABLY THREW HIS AnEMO LUCK AT ME AND MADE HIM COME HOME!! NOW THEY'RE BOTH CHILLING IN MY SERENITEA POT!!! btw my serenitea pot is so cool i love it when you can make little homes in games you should visit one day reader

(more brainrot) I GOT KAZUHA I GOT KAZUHA I GOT MAPLE LEAF!!! HE'S SO SILLY!!! I'M SHOVING HIM IN MY POCKET, SQUISHING HIM INTO A BALL, PUTTING HIM RIGHT BESIDE MY XIAO!! now.,.,.,.,., it's time...,.,.,.,.,., ahem.

...

i need to save for Wanderer in 4.6 but I just did the Aranara quest. WHOOPS. giggle giggle I think I'll do my hangouts, story quests, and level up my statues!! and explore, a lot of exploration!!! I'm almost at Mondstadt level 8, just level 7 with 200 xp left... Then it's onto Sumeru for glider!! and then... I have no clue, actually... um... whoopsies :3c

BUT. WHAT MATTERS IS THAT I GOT KAZUHA, IT'S XIAO'S BIRTHDAY (and my bbg sister Jesse's birthday please wish her a happy birthday too plsplspls reader), AND I HAVE TO SAVE UP FOR WANDERER. I swear Heizou you better be a featured 4 star soon, don't leave me hanging... YOUR INTUITION IS TELLING YOU TO DIVE INTO MY TEAM, I SWEAR!! Moon is very trustworthy pls trust yes intuition no lie :3

also, school has Moon burnt out, so she might not finish Xiao drawing today... waaaaa~

here's to hoping your gacha will be early <3 no matter what game you play, reader!! ehe~ take care!!

(pretend it's not April 16th, I'm following server time) HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAO HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAO HAPPY BIRTHDAY XIAO YOU'RE SO CUTE YOU'RE SO NICE YOUR BIRTHDAY MESSAGE WAS SO ADORABLE HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY IT ALMOST MAKES ME FEEL BAD ABOUT HAVING YOU AT LEVEL 1 WITH THE MAGICAL GIRL WAND!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY WE LOVE YOU XIAOOOOO!!! HAVE THE BEST DREAMS ABOUT TRAVELLER!!!!

im only posting to be excited about his bday (i'll draw art for him too!!) but aside from that, update on kazuha pulling situation:
Moon lost her 50/50 at ~80 pity and got Tighnari... Moon has ~77 pity currently and is doing her best to pull Kazuzuzuzu again!!! it's ok if I don't get him i'm lying, it's not ok, moon will be very sad because... Wanderer is getting a rerun in 4.6!!! Wanwan... wanwan... all moon wants to do is collect the silly emo boys... forever and ever!!! they keep traveller protected, but this time traveller shall protect them!! (let's pretend Heizou didn't have to be rescued)

also, school wildiing... i'll tell about it later.... im so burnt out these days I only wanted to make a post so moon could publically send Xiao happy bday wishes <33333 WE LOVE XIAO!!! he's so... he ^//-//^ have a nice birthday :)

please wish Xiao a happy birthday, reader~! be nice!!!! ^o^ <3 luv u

ok so... HI READER!!! so like um this'll just be short but i'm like talking to this guy and he's lowkey kinda weird (in a good way) but so funny too like omg he actually seems like a rlly good friend and dude, he's made me laugh so much... but if he tries rizzing me up im WALKING OUT THE FRONT DOOR!! (you know who you are, don't you. :3) btw he actually is like a hybrid of beta Xiao and the Xiao from invisible's vids. like omg

Asidesss from that... ughhh not going to school again because of health problems. I WILL go tomorrow!! but... speaking of days, I legit thought today was April fools and forgot it's the 2nd... I genuinely thought yesterday was 31st March despite writing the date down on documents and papers...

ALSO, IS MY XIAO TEASING ME??? LITERALLY A FEW DAYS AGO I HAD HIM ON LEVEL 2 FRIENDSHIP AND HE JUST NEEDED LIKE... 1, JUST 1 MORE XP TO GO TO LEVEL 3. I felt mocked. AND... NOW... AGAIN... HE'S ALMOST LEVEL 5. he's just staring at me while i mald and cope... is he TEASING ME?? please just let me get you to level 10 frienship already Xiao Moon is begging on her knees... do you want almond tofu??? is that it???????? this is hopeless... (q-q ;;

i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha i'm so excited to get Kazuha KAZUHAAAAAAAA whatever, he will come home one day... cheer me on, Reader!! Moon will cheer Reader on too!!! ^w^

i may love the AnEmo boys but there's one thing i love more than them. you, reader <3

huzzah... i... resurrected!!!!!!!

FIRST OF ALL,L SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SHAGGY, READER. THEN WE CAN TALK.

anyways I'M SCREAMINGGG IT'S BEEN SO LONG??? HELLO????? so uhm... some things happened... the pain is still here, and... I'm AR51 now!! apparently it's not good progress at all still, so I hope I can get quicker process... I hate being behind... but omg Sumeru and Fontaine archon quests <3

now... I'm still thinking about 4.5 phase two banners... i legit thought that Heizou was gonna be a 4 star and got so excited bc my friend thought and imagine my sheer disappointment upon realising he's not a featured 4 star. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO but also i got Gorou <3 after like 57 pulls on Chiori's banner like damn 💀 I c1'd Yun Jin and got got Dori but got Gorou after so long... PAIN. aside from that... Xingqiu is on the next banner so it's kinda oki :3 I wanna get consellations for him so bad, he's so cute!!!! >//-//< I CAN'T WAITTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and. i'm crying. i wanna collect all the AnEmo boys but I also want Neuvie so I'm stuck between pulling for Kazuzuzuzuzuzuzu or hydro dragon pump man. I WANT THEM BOTH SO MUCH BUT. i cant. help. pls. reader i tink i passed out i need u to resurrect me again. ok ty ill make u ur fav foodddd

Also... my assessments passed and... omg reader I don't even wanna say how they went. I'm CRYING LIKE how did everyone not get more than 90% 💀 IN ANYTHING TOO like what happened this year?? we were being too silly, that's probably what ehe~

that's it... you better have taken care of yourself in my absence. :( I never abandoned you, just got burnt out 💗 I play on Asia server :3 UID: 898154959

I just want one day where my blog isn't about my troubles... One day... Just one...

Hi reader!!... I'm very burnt out. For mostly no reason. Why "mostly"? well...You remember the lower abdominal pain in my first blogpost...? It's kind of back... and asides from that... I feel like a fizzy drink. No, seriously, I feel like an actual fizzy drink. My whole digestive track feels like someone poured a whole bunch of sprite in it, I'm burning from the inside out... Not to mention, this is making me miss days of school... Days of education... Education for my future!!! God damn it why does my body always betray my future!!!!! I will NOT end up like Venti!! no but seriously, somebody has probably cursed me with the way whenever I actually wanna go to school I just start being in agony...

Speaking of agony! Rememeber that ultra sound thing I mentioned? if you didn't i will let the fizziness get to me and explode Anyways, it's on Saturday!! I am so impatient for Saturday... Speaking of days, do you also get energetic on Fridays? honestly, Fridays are the best for me because I have the relief of knowing there's two holidays afterwards... why only two... Alas (I don't know what alas means), we must march forward!!! or just sit around like blobs. I like the second option better

Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaann... Reminds me, apparently the 'data leak' was a half-misunderstanding.. I'm less mad now but... honestly I do not even have the mental energy to get mad at someone... Hmmmmm... Since most of my comf chars are serious and straight-faced, should I also try that? Is this a sign from the universe? I feel like I could pull it off... But then again I would probably zone out more than be serious 💀 hmmm... can my 'brain empty, no thoughts' = straight-faced? Is using up all her brain juice going to assist Moon? THEN AGAIN, it's kinda boring to be serious all the time... like do you guys have skill issue with your emotions or smth (moon insulting all her comf/fav chars caught on camera)

ok... this makes Moon think even more... why are her comf characters the most dark and serious mfs!? what's the psychology behind this??? do i are stupid????? ... REMINDS ME AGAIN, why are my comf characters like... polar opposites of each other... LIKE VENTI AND WESKER. THE ONLY THING THEY HAVE IN COMMON IS GODHOOD AND BEING CAUCASIAN (since Mondstadt is based off Germany) LIKE LET ME TELL YOU READER, THIS TWINKY 'ehe~' BARD IS NO WHERE NEAR SIMILAR TO THIS CAT-EYED MEOWMEOW MAN. IF YOU GAVE ME LIKE 5B USD IF I COULD SAY 3 SIMILARITIES BETWEEN THEM I WOULD WALK AWAY. or i would make things up lol wait now I'm thinking if Zhongli and Wesker could get along... two peepaws talking together, perfect

Aside from Moon's 'why are my comf chars so different' crisis, I got to lvl 37 in Genshin!!!! Like WEWWW that took... quite long, actually. Mostly because I was straying from the main story and actually doing stuff I didn't need to lol but now I got an ok team!! I main lvl 70 Nahida (Nahida kinnie :3) and use a hyperbloom team (both lvl 40 Barbara and Kuki Shinobu), and as for the 4th char... Just anyone I need, really. Someone's Gaming for extra Shrine of Maya damage, sometimes Noelle for her shield, sometimes Kaeya to freeze things... ouhhh but Barbara isn't a good hydro applicator :( I mean, she certainly is an okay healer (Not as good as Yaoyao imo), but I really want someone else, reader!! And that someone else is... THE PEEPAW HYDRO DRAGON NEUVILETTE!! there's a leak he'll be on banner for 4.5 and that leak BETTER be true!! I haven't gotten to Fontaine story arc yet (on Inazuma rn) but I love him sm... I'm saving up my fates and primos for his banner, and I really hope I get him! If I lose him to some other 5 star... Moon might cry... Apparently he's the most OP character ingame as of current, and I wonder how fun it'll be to play as him... aaaa peepaw hydro dragon (also i am the real Paimon i am the best travel companion yes yes)

OH!! AND THANK YOU SO MUCH LACY FOR HELPING ME THROUGH GENSHIN, YOU HELPED ME DEMOLISH DOMAINS AND QUESTS AND YOU'RE SUCH A HUGE HELP FOR GETTING MY NAHIDA TO 70!!! mwaaaa (reader you better thank Lacy as well)

Hmm, what else do I say.. Right! Moon met Shaggy again a few days back! She wishes she could show reader his pictures, but... she hasn't uploaded them yet lul guess reader'll have to wait for the next blogpost for some puppy pics :P mwahahahhaha

Oki, reader! That's all there is for right now! All I can remember, anyways... You better be staying okay!! >:(

You can always friend me on Genshin, reader, if you need any assistance~! UID: 898154959

This will be short bc I'm about to sleep soon!!! noooooooo~

So I've been going to school again~ It's fun! ... Not really... Aaaa, basically we're having sports events this week so we've got a whole lotta walking and a whole lotta excercises to do! My legs... brokem... augh... TT The main event is on Thursday and I think most girls will take a day off LMAOOOOOOOOOO What they deserve for making us march the whole ground twice... In the shivering cold... Missing a WHOLE CLASS!!! Btw my class teacher made me responsible for this new girl and I need to 'make friends with her' and WHY ME 😞 EVERYONE KNOWS I'M THE MOST INTROVERTED IN THE CLASS!?!?!?! I STUTTERED 19 TIMES JUST SAYING HI!!!!! but thank goodness gracious the new girl is nice and polite ehe~

Aside from that... Yes... It is indeed time to talk about the headline...

MY INFO WAS LEAKED!!!! ughhh what do ppl not understand about consent and laws... 😒 can they not think!? anyways it wasn't major like my name or smth but ughghghghhg ppl got no understanding of privacy do they... hint: it relates from a person in a past post of mine.. hwack thooh!!!!!! Blehhh, imagie doing that!! Bleh! Shame, shameeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!! and last time I checked, it was not for the greater good... Whatever! I'll get over it, their lossssss~! Reader, tell me, do you think lil' ol' Moon deserves this 🥺

Btw I got to lvl 30 in Genshin finally LMAO anddd NANDANDA NDNADN AND AND ANDDDDDDD I gotttt... NAHIDA EREYESTERDAY NIGHT~! hehehehhe... I had to clear my whole Genshin screen recordings folder though since it took... Let me see.... 50+ GB!!!! hey, why does the plus sign not italicize... ew... Does anyone wanna help me in Genshin? Anyone wanna co-op with me!??!?!? Or does anyone need my help, fufufufu... Reader, will youuuuu? 🥺🙏

Okay, that's it~ I have to sleep! Need to wake up at 6... I wake up so late... >,<;;

Reader, reader, reader!! Remember, do not leak personal info!! And if you do... Shame... Shame on you. And remember to friend me in Genshin, reader ;3 I deff won't take advantage and do nothing while you beat bosses ;3 Pinky promise! And I never break my promises, unlike some ;3

I was supposed to post yesterday but I couldn't 💔 I was too depressed and lazy to do it.. Well, I'll post what happened yesterday and a bit of today! But it's not very happy... Haha why are my blogposts always sad >,<

Well... My dear Grandfather died on 5th of Feb, 2023. As you can realise, that was day was yesterday... And so it was his death anniversary! It was a sad day, not very joyful, but we did share a bit of laughter sometimes. Grandpa was a great man, and I'm not exaggerating. I don't remember a time where he ever yelled at me, and he didn't yell at anyone else either. He always gave loans, gifts, and my mom told me, when I was an infant, he used to take care of me when she was too tired to. He used to stay awake late up at midnight despite his old age and cradle me to sleep. Apparently, I instantly went to sleep in his arms. I wasn't close to him, I barely talked to him but he was still a good part of my life.

Me, my cousins, aunts, uncles, parents, and grandmother prayed for him in the first half. We then ate a feast and reminisced about him a lot, lot, lot. While praying, I can't believe it but I managed to cry despite not making any facial expression. It really hurts to know that you'll never physically ever meet or talk to the person ever again, no matter what. I really wish he could've lived longer, though his health was rapidly declining and he was already in a lot of pain. Being in pain for years, he still had a great temper and was patient till the end.

We then had to visit him at the cementry before it got dark... Unfortunately, I wasn't able to meet with Shaggy yesterday. All I said was hello to him and gave him a headpat, and I could tell he was upset with me not coming to visit him. I managed to snap some pictures! He was barking a ton... I'm sorry Moon didn't visit you for a month 💔

So, we went to the cementry... We prayed more there and then, our final stop: My grandparents' old home! It was the place where we last saw grandfather in good, full health... We still sometimes expect him to come in from a door... I do hallucinate his coughs or voice when I'm at grandma's place...

The old home has some of my fondest memories there! It was a nice, worryfree life back then... We sat at the ground floor, where grandfather shifted since he was too weak to go up and down the staircase. I took this pic there! If I'm gonna be honest, a ton of stuff there is very pretty and I took many photos, but to respect my privacy I've shown only one that I found the prettiest~

Apparently it was a gift! Many items there are gifts... Apparently old people were very into gifting things... I realy hope I can find something similar to it one day to decorate my room with!! Asides from that, many items in the old home are untouched... Grandpa's medicine tray, where he still has the salt and his medicine he was supposed to take... His clothes hanging on the rack... And the small, little garden he used to take care of. Unfortunately, it was infested by black bees, and some had stung him years prior, so we stopped going outside to view the plants... I remember me and my cousins finding many snails and ladybugs there!

After staying on the ground floor for an hour, we head upstairs, partially because grandmother begun to cry. Upstairs brought back way too many memories... I used to spend all my time there with my cousins when I was visiting... We used to visit every Saturday back then... Oh, how much I miss those days. Life was tough, not as modern or technologial as now, but it was more organic and honestly, even better. Let life one day return to the carefree fantasy it used to be...

Over there, we spotted some DVDs next to the casset tapes. Those DVDs included my whole mom's side memories! I inserted one today and there were pics of a cute little baby bat my uncle took 💗

I've started thinking about the day he passed... I miss him... We all do. I actually was supposed to visit my grandparents on the 4th since we hadn't visited them for about a month or two, but my mom said she'd get all work done on that day so we could have a relaxed visit on the 5th... I don't blame Mom for that decision, I'm just upset that we couldn't've seen him one last time. Who knows, maybe he could've still been alive, then... Please don't try to procrastinate spending time with your loved ones, reader. I didn't know my grandpa for long but it hurt surprisingly much, so please take these words of advice.

I'll keep it short from now on since I have to sleep and finish my drawings... Me, my cousins, my aunt, my mom, and my uncle went upstairs to the roof to remember him more. He used to always feed the wild kites and birds, despite most of them being huge and dangerous. He had a clear gentle soul, and I wish I could've known him for longer. We looked around, thought about all the memories we'd shared here for decades, and finally, it was time to return.

We all wished we could've stayed for longer, but it was getting close to midnight and the streets weren't exactly safe. Think of the hood, but Asia. And so, finally, we went outside, got to our cars, and parted ways when we drove off. I miss gathering like those, surprisingly. I hate social events but this one wasn't for talking and keeping up appearances and reputation, but more for remembering someone we all respected.

Ma and I have taken a vacation today since we knew we weren't mentally strong enough to immediately go into our daily busy lives with this on our minds. Today was a bit fun, not the best but it was okay... I'm currently in braids, I don't like how they look but they feel ok so I'll sleep in them lol

TIL heating pads exist in my country too... Yay!!! #cancelperiods2024 xoxoxo But aside from all of this... I can't remember much that happened today... I can only remember yesterday.

Hey, reader? Promise Moon you'll stay ok and stay connected to your loved ones. And if you don't have any loved ones, it's ok—I'll always be here.

So I went to the Doctor today to get an auditory test to see if there's a physical cause for my tinnitus or not... And guess what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No physical cause, and I don't have hearing loss!! :3 but I'm considered handicaped now TT like,, catastrophically handicaped :(

Ok but I also brought up my misophonia there!! Actually, my Mom did... But details, detailsss >,> Speaking of Mom... We both woke up late today so we were late to the appointment 💀 BUT WHATEVER!! The doctors were great this time too, very surprisingly :3 I got a pep talk from them on that it'll be fine and my tinnitus will (hopefully) go away one day since it's all in my brain

I actually wanna talk about the auditory test now... It felt so weird sitting in that box! I could feel the pressure change once they closed the door, and it was kinda hard for me to breathe than usual. I was kind of getting hesitant on clicking the button because I was anxious that I might be hallucinating some of the bell sounds kkkkkkkkkkkk

After that, the Doctors just told me I'll be fine in a couple of weeks! There's no medicine or chemical cure, but I just have continue blocking out the tinnitus until the cycle is broken. Tinnitus is just a symptom of something bigger, so we may not know... But ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it's so hard to fall asleep Q,Q I just want to hear actual silence again one day!!! What's scary is that since it's just some months, it can be reversable... But if it happened for years, there's a chance Moon'll just have to live like this... Forever! Are you kidding me!? I don't want thatttt :(

Once Moon was free from the clutches of a doctor's appointment, she went to buy some food with her Ma!! It was nice, I'm sure we cracked some jokes, I just can't remember anything that happened. I wish I could remember things again...

And... Aside from that, the ongoing bladder pain, and acid reflexes, I've once again been thinking of a few people...

They actually used to be Moon's friends before... But then they abandoned me so suddenly. They gave some type of bad excuse as to why but I always knew they didn't really want me to be their friend. And since they've left me, this probably is a sign that I never needed them, right??? Good people always stick with you til the end! Right? I'm really angry at them tbh but I also feel like i couldn't care less. but at the same same same time why would I be so sad if I didn't care lol I just wish I could've seen the betrayal sooner. I always knew they didn't want me in their friendgroup. Actually, they kicked me out. Literally. Not to mention they did that when I was already having a very, very bad week :( They also decided to do it at the start of the year... Did they even consider my feelings???? How rude! I've sworn to never trust another person now!

But the bad things keep on adding up... Specifically, this one person started it all and then others began to follow... I hate this! I was so dumb to trust them in the first place, I hate this so much! It's made me gone into weeks of depression and I still haven't recovered! But whatever, they don't care about me so I won't care as much about them! One day, they will realise what they've done.

It still feels baddd... I hate playing Genshin because one of the people in the friendgroup used to play it a lot... He was actually the one that made me interested in it... I wanted to play because I wanted to co-op with him one day and have fun... I honestly didn't get invited many times to do things with my ex-friends, I always felt ignored and unwanted, always talking to eachother but never me... They never wanted to play something with me, and even if they did we couldn't because of other complications... But they most likely were excuses so they didn't have to hang out with me... They all hung out with eachother, but never with me... Ugh, I hate this so much! They all betrayed me but here I am blabbering like an idiot in my blog as if they'll ever see this! I really hope they never see this.

Worst part? I still want to be with them. I still want to reunite with them despite how bad they've treated me and didn't even communicate or simply talk to me. I still want to talk to them and have our small convos whenever I could get their attention. I still want to laugh and joke around with them. This isn't fair, but I still want to know if they're doing okay. I don't like them anymore, but I sitll don't stop wondering if anyone's doing ok or not. No matter what bad terms we ended with I still keep thinking about the people I cut ties with. I don't want to always talk to them again—Only know if they're safe and sound! Even if they left me in the trenches while I was at my lowest.

They didn't care about me, but I still do.

Please try to be cautious and actually befriend those who'll never do harm, reader. I made the mistake of trusting the wrong people. Don't make that same mistake. Take care, reader.

Omg omg OMG I have a blog now!!!!!!! hii everyone :) I hope you enjoy my rambling and life stories!! I will add emojis that I can post here too :3 Hmm, I think I'll first write down what happened yesterday!

Yesterday was a very scary day... So, I first woke up at 6:30 AM as I usually do! (I wake up at 5 normally but I have a bad sleeping schedule these days) When I woke up, I felt like something was really wrong... There was a big pain in my lower abdomen, so I went to the bathroom. It got even worse then! When I was washing my hands, I couldn't even see properly, I was staring at the hallucinations I was having and I still couldn't focus on even them!! I was really sleepy the whole time then started to gag, but I couldn't vomit anything out since I skipped on eating before I slept, so all there was was stomach acid and empty air... I was panicking a lot by then! When I stood up my brain couldn't tell where gravity was, so I kept on tripping and tripping! I couldn't wash my hands so I then sat down on the toilet seat... I still almost fell while sitting!! The whole time I kept on gagging and everything was sooooo foggy... I spent maybe 25 minutes in that bathroom with this on repeat! Finally I properly washed my hands and climbed into my bed... But the pain was AWFUL!! I know it was from my bladder, but I didn't drink THAT much water before I slept... I pulled my blankets over me and tried to fall asleep... In that much pain, I actually fainted rather than peacefully fall asleep... :(

The next time I woke up, it was already 10! I was shocked at how much I slept... But I couldn't really be blamed, right? I slept at 3 AM too... But guess what was still there? THE PAIN! It was still there... After so many hours... It was still there to taunt me!! I almost felt myself pass out again, but I kept myself snuggled under the blankets and pillows in an effort for it to stop. It kinda hurt less whenever I curl up, like put some pressure on my tummy. I decided to just go on my phone and play something... I ended up playing Genshin for a few minutes, but the pain was almost intensifying! Wanting to eat some painkillers, I ate the tiniest bit of food, though I couldn't eat more than a few bites... After that I called Ma asking for advice, and she decided that since I had an appointment for my tinnitus yesterday, she'd bring this up there too. Yay!! I continued to play Genshin and tried to sleep again, since I won't feel the pain if I'm unconscious!

Mom came home maybe 2-3 hours later, and I was barely alive (lel) We quickly got in the car and I zoooooomed to the hospital! We arrived maybe 30 minutes later. I kept trying not to sleep in the car ride hehe... The pain was helping with that TT

FINALLY we arrived at the hospital and I swiftly went to the appointment!! I love the Doctor there, she's so nice and relatable, she actually listens to the patients and doesn't barge in with her own hypothesies without hearing the whole story first! Though, the Doctor then had to examine me... The probbing hurt a TONNNNN!!!! I barely held myself back from crying >,< Luckily my Wesky plushie was there to comfort me!

After that whole examination, since Mom actually has a job there, she told me to wait in the car... To which Moon did. It was in the hospital parking lot, and Moon sat there until the clock struck 5! It was actually high and airy, the views were beautiful and it was very refreshing 💗 No humidity at all! I spent most my time taking pictures, watching YT, and playing Genshin and Love Nikki!! Love Nikki is kind of a childhood game of mine hehe

Speaking of Genshin, I only got in it like a few days ago! I love Noelle and Gaming, playing as them (especially Gaming) is fun hehe I'm only level 17 rn :P I've met this Japanese person on there through co-op and now I can pratice my Japanese with them 💦 I've started to learn Japanese because it can be handy!! I already know 5 languages, knowing another won't be thattt bad...

Back on track! Mom got back from her job and we then headed to pick up Dad, then we went home! I was still in pain the whole day, but not as much as the morning...

Now it's tomorrow! Tomorrow night, actually! Time passes quick... It's weird! The pain is still there, but not as much as before... It still hurts a lot, Moon hates it! It's really annoying, and I can't even move sometimes without yelping... I'll get an Ultrasound, but Moon is very scared of getting one... It hurt when the Doctor probbed, and I already know how hard they press in ultrasounds, no wanna go through that agony!! Aside from pain, not much has happened today... I tried Vitamin gummies for the first time! I didn't know healthy things could be so yummy!?!?!? I thought they didn't exist in my region!!! I might have to eat them all... Hehe...

Aside from me being unable to control myself and overdose on gummy vitamins, I got a drawing tablet!! YES!!! So happy, finallyyy!! I'm going to post art on my art blog veryyyyyy soon, very! Hopefully... If I'm not a lazy butt... Hopefully!?

Well, this is the end of my first blog!! So many things to say, but Moon's memory cannot keep up... wahhh

Funny thing about the gummy pic, while I was taking it I had an acid regurgitation... Have these gummies cursed me!?!? But wew, that hurt... A LOT. It reached all up to my mouth and it was WHOLE ton, most of my concern immediately was that I couldn't breathe and that my tissues were getting damaged! It was so horrid and I tried to vomit, but (again) didn't eat much :3 But now I'm okay! I can't speak or make any vocalizations, but I'm okkkkk!!! goodbye now, bye bye ^o^

Take care of yourself, reader!! Or else...